Ever feel?

Ever  feel like a doormat?
Like people just walk all over you and they don't
care about your feelings??
Ya, I feel like this ALL the freaking time.
Family AND friends do this to me.
I'm not going to name names because,
let's face it, it'll start massive drama which I definitely
don't need. Either way I'm sure if anyone reads this
they will get mad.
But here's the deal....

In my family, it's EXTREMELY obvious that people pick favorites.
Fine, whatever if you like someone more than the other, just don't make
it so dang obvious.

My family complains because Matthew doesn't like certain people.
Well DUH! He's not going to like you if he NEVER gets to see you.
My family apparently complains a lot about me but they just don't say it
to my face. Nice huh??
I don't spend time with you because you're too wrapped up with your husband
or your job, or your wife. Seriously, NO one with a 2 year old can work their
schedule around YOUR life.
Oh and I'm sorry I can't make it to functions because I live half way to Tucson
or that we only have one vehicle right now. Sorry that I don't want to waste
gas driving around town. Why is it that NO one can drive to see me?

Friends. Ya, sorry but my "so called friends" kind of suck.
Ya, it's harsh but its totally true.
"Let's make plans and never actually follow through with them."
Who cares about your feelings. What does it matter if I lie to you?
What does it matter that you totally screwed me and made me look
like an idiot?

I'm just so fed up with EVERYONE. So if you read this and you think
its about you, it probably is. And if you think your feelings are hurt, well think
about mine.
 I am in a VERY lonely place. No one ever wants to come over and hang out
because "its too far." Right, because driving to you with Matthew is so much more
convenient?
Sorry, that I can't go out whenever you ask because I don't have
a babysitter. Excuse me for trying to be a good mom and NOT bring my child with me.
I know it must be so inconvenient for you.

I'm just done. I don't call or text because I just get let down in the end.
Over and Over again. I quit.

I just want to move away to another state and move on with life.
Start over and find people who actually care about me.


I'm just gonna worry about myself and the people that matter
the most, Berto and Matty.